Tag Archives: teacher

The Thrill of Change

One of the greatest mysteries of life is how much control we really have over our lives. Is there a God? Are we at the hands of fate? Or are we ultimate Creators? Or all of the above?!

When we find ourselves in the throes of change, even change we instigated, it can be a shock to realize how much power we have, while at the same time having to admit that we know very little about what may play out.

I believe we come in to this world with preferences, a kind of rough draft outline devised by the Divine (which includes Us, by the way!)

travel planImagine you are about to go on a very long trip. You have a general idea of the destination, you’ve heard it’s pretty, usually has nice weather and there are many opportunities to play and relax and meet interesting people.  So you book your ticket.  You may look at brochures of what other people have experienced in this new environment, and you may stare out the window of the plane imagining what you may do once there.

But do you really know what will happen once you arrive?  Of course not!  That’s like saying, you will know that a man named Greg will pop up to you at the airline counter and offer you a first class seat. Or the person in the cab on the way to the hotel will redirect you to a different hotel that is much better. Or that you will meet a tall handsome stranger at dinner on the first night and end up getting married the following week.  Who knows?! Anything is possible once you arrive.  But you start with preferences…

Once you are in the flow of life, every moment is a dance of cause and effect. What mood are you in? What do you expect? Are you happy or sad? Are you in grief or ecstatic at the game that is playing out? Do you want to stop and play again?  These are all chances to experience life from different vantage points. So much can happen on the way from A to B, that you may very well find yourself at Z and have to start all over again!

What I love to do is begin with a general idea of what I would like to create, and write it down. Sometimes I doodle or cut out images, but most times my imagination is more than enough.  As a hypnotist, I have no trouble visualizing and creating inner worlds!  What is truly amazing is when they come to pass and appear in my outer reality, quite unexpectedly.

Because of change, things I never thought I would do, I have already done (like acting, having a baby – or two, travelling around the world, creating a business). And things I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to handle, I did (like divorce, death of a loved one, moving, starting a new career) and more!

Some of my greatest miracles came out of the darkest storms and greatest times of change…

I am grateful for all the change that has led me here now!

Change occurs when our unconscious or conscious desires come true! They can be quite positive or negative depending on our inner world, the expectations and influence of those around us, which is what we allow ourselves to be exposed to.

You can change anything if you really want to – except your essential self, and other people! It’s not about eradicating what is… it’s about accentuating what is or creating what could be! And if you don’t like change, you can change that too. Just stay stuck awhile and see where life takes you!

women change

No matter what we do, we will inevitably change, and change is good for us, as it is the zest of life, what great writers write about, what lovers moon about, and what dogs howl about. It moves us in the right direction, even when everything appears to be going wrong. Great change can come even from tragedy. Progress comes from its opposite. So, change always moves in a positive direction over time. It’s all a collective choice!

Is there any point to all this change?

Well, like travel or anything else, we learn by doing something new. We learn what we can and cannot do. We learn what we like and what we cannot tolerate. We learn what could go wrong and how to adjust the plan. There is no one way to do it, and there is no real wrong turn, for there is always a change that will open us yet again to something we hadn’t thought of before!

It is all up to you! And you, and You!  

Each of us creates change, and our world too. Our world is just a giant mirror of our collective wishes, beliefs and dreams. We can embrace and create change, or try to stay the same…  Something mysterious will always turn us one way or the other, to create something more positive, even if life has to shake us a little more.  We are being moulded by an internal Force, and what seem to be external circumstances that we helped create!

We are like the clay and the potter (Isaiah 64:8), the wrecking ball and the glue that brings it all together.  God is in us, and we are in God too! There is nothing we can’t do!

(Except know all of this in advance. Except always know what to do. Because we are human, we forget that we are powerful creators. And we forget God, too.)

Sometimes, you just have to wait for it. Change will catch up to you!

Sooner or later you will discover, The Miracle is You!

 

I would love to hear what you have to say. Write to Krista.

 

 

What is Love?

A friend asked me this question, and I am commissioned to answer.  I would be wise not to try to answer it by saying what love is, for as A Course in Miracles says, love cannot be defined.  But perhaps in offering what love is not I can suggest its opposite. But, as the Course says, “what is all-encompassing can have no opposite”.

There is only one cure for “love” in this world and that is God.

I have known glimpses of love’s scent. I have known the quality of joy looking back in the mirror, the glow of understanding, of surrender. The big AHA that comes as a deep sigh within. The grateful feeling of love’s proximity keeping us safe from the wizards of doom.

I do not believe that love comes from one person. I do not believe that we are meant to love only one person and put all our hopes and dreams on that. That is not love, but devastation. For people will always disappoint you.

No one should be used as a “replacement” for Love. No one can put windows and doors around Love’s Presence. When you feel it, you know it. It is a safe but unbordered country. I have no idea how to define it or even say I know it clearly.I am still humble in the ways of love.

Any relationship, or lack of relationship, can be transformed by surrendering your ideas about it, and asking for a “miracle” instead.

We all make mistakes. And though I said we cannot find Love in another person, I meant exclusively. If we try to possess another person as our own – as in “My Family”, “My Spouse”, “My Children”, we are boxing them in. We are not seeing them for who they really are – unique individuals, yes, on a mission of their own. Each person is born with a unique blueprint, a purpose for being here. And believe me, it is not to satisfy you and make your life easier.  That is your job.

If you are expecting others to do the work for you, to reach those arms around you and keep you safe, they will inevitably disappoint. That is their job!  To show you where your weak spots are, to stimulate rejection so you can learn, to catalyze transformation.

Believe it or not, that purpose is truer to Love’s Cause than the other. Anyone you choose to make yourself comfortable, static and “the same” is just your way of keeping yourself in a holding pattern. It may feel like a house, a relationship, a life, but it is just your way of feeling safe. That doesn’t mean you can’t have those things, they are necessary to life, but they are not what life is for.

True love says Go, do what you have to do. Don’t worry about me. True love let’s another person grow beyond the edges of what is comfortable for either one. True love sees a relationship as an opportunity to grow, forgive and let go. Of expectations, definitions, demands, and other subtle ways we try to control the other. Unless something is freely given, it isn’t a gift, it’s a temporary prison.

So what is love? I don’t know. But it isn’t this: It isn’t waiting for the perfect person to come along. It isn’t looking at other people as potential soul-mates and measuring whether they fit the bill. It isn’t designing a life for yourself where only certain people belong.

Love is weightless, empty and strong. Love does not expect, declare or remain anywhere too long. Love is friendly and kind, as Paul the Apostle said. But it doesn’t always come with a marriage certificate.  Does that mean two people can’t love each other? No. It means our new job here is to decide if we are willing to let go. To really see another person for who they are, who they could be, but bear no interference in their crossing that bridge for themselves. We can lend a hand, that’s all.

Does that mean we walk alone? Absolutely not!  There are many friends for the journey. Not only your “mate”, but the whole world around you. You just have to look around. You have to offer it to someone – anyone!  You can’t just wait for it to happen. I hate to say this, but it’s like the Red Cross blood commercial:

It’s In You To Give

I hope that didn’t exasperate you too much. It exacerbates  me too, sometimes! I am only human. But my Divine Self is persistent and seems to have put me on this path. Even though I don’t know all the time, something in me does. And so I attempt to share the best way I can.

I hope that helps in some way. I hope that doesn’t discourage at all, but opens doors, window-frames, and every other structure you’ve laid. I talk of you, me and everyone here. We are all the same.

The truth is, we are not alone. We have many Helpers, friends, lovers. We are all commissioned to the task at hand. To learn to love each other. And if we can’t do that, to forgive.

That is all for now.

Amen.


Day 20: “Love Liberates”

Maya Angelou

I listened to Maya Angelou speaking on “Oprah’s Master Class” tonight.  “Love liberates,” she said.  What is a good teacher/friend/mother/lover? The one who loves enough to let go.

As a mother, I am beginning to learn to let go. Tomorrow is my daughter’s 9th birthday. She is now riding a 20″ bike instead of 16″.  She is also brilliant, opinionated and loving. My son is 14 and joined her on my husband’s man-size bike. He is now an excellent musician, almost as tall as me, and is a kind-hearted “young man”.  Next September he will be in high school. I am happy, excited for him. I am happy he will no longer be just around the corner, but to a a place a bit farther off, getting the best education he can (and meeting lots of  new friends!).  With Heather I have a little more time… 🙂

But as a student, I still cling to the authority of teachers. To the “A grade”.  I am getting better, admittedly. Tremendously wiser and more detached. This past year I have slowly, painfully learned I was wrong to sacrifice my present happiness for approval, acceptance.  I had been well-trained to pursue, to excel at what I do. But the things I cherish most in my life now have nothing to do with that. It took me embarking on a new path to discover this for myself.  It is time to grow up.

This “clinging to the guru” can sometimes take on an unpleasant scent – one of self-sacrifice and onerous intent. What/who am I doing this for?  When you have signed a contract you usually know what is expected of each party.   One may want to extend the contract to infinity and beyond. The other may want to move on. What is right?

At what point do you say, enough is enough? With compassion, I am ready to move on. I must walk my walk. Sing my Song!  

Inspired by Maya’s words, I wrote these power statements:

Even as they try to hold me,
I let go.
 
I am not bound to anyone
I already belong.
 
There is no separation, lack or need
In the darkness they will be freed.
 
No one has the power to bind me ever again
Today I walk in peace.

Anyone who tries to bind you is working from the ego, not love.  This is what Maya Angelou said. And I know this.  But I also know, no matter who you are dealing with (teacher/friend/student); if one is in pain or spent, their only need is compassion, not rejection. Letting go in love is the answer.

I have learned this lesson: “I have  everything. I can afford to be generous.”

Somehow, somewhere, I have become the teacher. 

Amen.